Monday 27 February 2017

Generic list post: February 2017

Obligatory wrap-up post of those songs I've played most during the month when Milo got Ernest Bakered outta position. Also the month when us those of us who aren't Nas fanboys were reminded just how bad the Ether beat is.

OutKast ft. Killer Mike & Slimm Calhoun - Funkanella (2000)
Fat Tone ft. Boi Big - Walking In The Rain (2003)
Fat Tone - Not Guilty (2003)
OMB Peezy - Interracial Relations (2017)
OMB Peezy - When I Was Down (2017)
Donae'O ft. JME & Dizzee Rascal - Black (2016)
Donae'O - Black/Bounce (Social Circles Remix) (2017)
Mr. Eazi ft. Wizkid, Eddie Kadi & Maleek Berry - Leg Over (2017)

Other notables: Big Choo's upcoming remake of Dolamite's O.G Bounce Thugs-N-Harmony classic potentially sounds like New Orleans' equivalent of Be Faithful; it's not that I dislike the new Roc Marciano album, it just doesn't contain a killer song like Ridin' Around or We Ill; there was a glut of new Maine Musik & T.E.C music this month but none of it sounded Louisiana enough for my liking; Kap G is now 0 for 2 as far as 2017 songs go because No New Friends sounds like the 19th song on a 20 track Migos mixtape; it's heartwarming that finding Jesus has helped Mr.2-17 deal with Bankroll Fresh's death, but his new full length suggests he's now incapable of making a simple club banger without tryna save someone's soul on it; Nef The Pharaoh's Jacka tribute with Rydah J. Clyde is decent for what it is, but all I want right now is Nef's upcoming song with Mannie Fresh.

Friday 24 February 2017

Funkanella >>>>> Funcrusher Plus

Late pass! Ain't gon' front like my knowledge of Dungeon Family unreleased/rare joints isn't fairly basic. I'd never heard the shelved ATLiens-era track Roaches And Rats which surfaced in 2006 until last year, and I was utterly unaware of this pre-Stankonia bangeur until yesterday:

"From East Point to New York, it's OutKast and Clue y'all
Howdy doo, y'all... Howdy doo, y'all!"


OutKast ft. Killer Mike & Slimm Calhoun - Funkanella
(From DJ Clue's Backstage: A Hard Knock Life compilation; 2000)



Hard to believe the third rapper on this now exclusively makes unlistenable music with the "pudgy, fish-faced ginger" snitch from Company Flow. What happened to the Earth(tone III)?

Tuesday 21 February 2017

It's ya boy (literally)

If Ya Boy Big Choo is New Orleans' equivalent of Fatman Scoop circa the Crooklyn Clan's AV8 Records singles, then this upcoming remake of Dolamite's O.G Bounce & Bullshit classic teased on Instagram has the potential to be his Be Faithful. Only difference is, Scoop had to be played by a cartoon bobblehead in the Be Faithful video because he was a fat bastard who dances like your dad, while Choo is the same size as pre-diet Fat Joe but moves like a combination of Ronaldinho and Mr. Hit Dat Hoe:


Top 3 most anticipated songs right now: this Big Choo shit, the Nef The Pharaoh & Mannie Fresh slap, and the first track in this OMB Peezy vlog.

Monday 20 February 2017

Ya blogga chose me

"Come f*ck with Blood, you'll see some shit you never seen befo'
Bitch, you hella bad, I think I seen you in my dreams befo'"


Lil' Blood & 12 Gauge Shotie - Mack
(From Chicken Talk album; 2016/YouTube; 2017)



Some ramshackle mob shit for a monday. If ya host had to choose like that lass in The Mack, I'd plump for this track over anything from Lil' Blood's new album with DJ Fresh. Song's retarded, but in the best possible taste, dahhlink!

Thursday 16 February 2017

Generic list post: 5 fives (Last Dayz)

Already tackled the subject of opening songs on rap albums, so in the interest of #balance, here's a different kind of generic list post about closing songs on rap albums.

Dedicatin' this post to the now-defunct Ego Trip website, a place which knew a thing or two about rap lists. Thank you for reposting my AZ and Grand Puba playlists, fuck you for reposting Wicked22's crappy mixes.

5 killer final songs on rap albums:
Slick Rick - Lick The Balls (1988)
Raekwon & Ghostface Killah - Heaven & Hell (1995)
Snoop Doggy Dogg ft. Lil' Malik - Pump Pump (1993)
The Jacka - Barney (More Crime) (2005)
Eric B. & Rakim - Kick Along (1992)

Woulda been killer final songs if not for an outro or bonus remix:
Camp Lo - Coolie High (1997)
Ice-T - Soul On Ice (1988)
Juvenile - Money On The Couch (1997)
MF DOOM ft. Kurious - ? (1999)
Z-Ro - Happy Feelingz (2004)

Shout out to these 5 bonus tracks, though, innit:
UGK - Wood Wheel (2001)
Black Sheep - The Choice Is Yours (Revisited) (1991)
Dr. Dre ft. Death Row - Bitches Ain't Shit (1992)
Sean "Diddy" Combs - Get Off (2006)
YG ft. Pushaz Ink - When I Was Gone (2014)

5 tracks which shoulda been killer final songs on rap albums:
AZ - Doe Or Die (1995)
Egyptian Lover - I Cry (Night After Night) (1984)
Lil' Boosie - Trouble Man (2005)
2Pac - Death Around The Corner (1995)
Mac Dre - So Hard (2001)

5 shitty final songs on killer rap albums:
N.W.A - Something 2 Dance 2 (1988)
De La Soul ft. Biz Markie - Stone Age (1993)
GZA ft. Killah Priest - B.I.B.L.E (1995)
Public Enemy - Party For Your Right To Fight (1988)
Cypress Hill - Born To Get Busy (1991)

I generally choose not to acknowledge the existence of North Star (Jewels) since I never heard it until the early noughties due to not owning a CD copy of Only Built 4 Cuban Linx until then. There's a reason why people sweat The Purple Tape, but nobody gives a shit about The Red CD: the former ends on peak-rap music with Heaven And Hell, the latter ends on a superfluous-arse throwaway.

Wednesday 15 February 2017

Will the defendant please rise

Court is now in session (no Chill Rob G.)

Conclusive proof that We Want Some Pussy is the best song on Ezale's Tonite Show:


Stop Come On and Day Ones both bodied via vehicular homicide.

I rest my case, y'honour.

Tuesday 14 February 2017

File this under ‘one for the Brits’ (again)

Ever since a gang of scallies kicked Sophie Lancaster south of Heaven in 2007, there's been a war goin' on pon road no goff is safe from. Thankfully the mandem have been working tirelessly to repair the damage wrought by their working class white counterparts in recent years: man'll now spend their days in the colour of mourning, living Bauhaus every weekend. Even the Party Hard bloke has shown that he's down for the Count like Dracula's people and remixed his 2003 UK Garage classic My Philosophy (Bounce) with a Transylvanian twist by combining it with his 2016 single Black. There are songs for doz that slept, and then there are songs for doz that slept in a coffin:

Donae'O - Black/Bounce (Social Circles Remix)
(From t'internet; 2017)



Speakin' of Donae'O, was Farmer Yardie the UK Garage equivalent of T La Rock's Live Drummin' With The Country Boy?

Monday 13 February 2017

Important reminder

Not only did Maino's Role Model body Eminem with his own concept, that shit was also the best Broken Language homage since Juvenile's Pimpinabitch. Contrary to the title of the mixtape Role Model came from, Maino was not The Future, but this song and the gossip-mongering street DVD anthem Rumors will forever have a place in ya host's personal canon of noughties N.Y rap.

"I'm bad company, don't look up to me
I'm not kinda person you should ever want to be"


Maino - Role Model
(From Maino Is The Future mixtape; 2008)


Saturday 11 February 2017

Wanted dead or alive: ID this song plz


What's the song in this video 5th Ward Weebie posted on Instagram? I can't work out if it's a Bounce song, a Dancehall song, or some combination of the two genres, let alone who the artist is. Might have to watch the video another 15 times in a row just to get to the bottom of what's goin' down here.

Thursday 9 February 2017

IG Off & Slapardous

Already learned a harsh lesson not to get too excited about Nef The Pharaoh Instagram snippets after Everything Big turned out to be a disappointment, but this song with Mannie Fresh sounds like it has potential, especially since OMB Peezy might be on there too.


I'll bet you Peezy could knock out a real disrespectful remake of Mannie's Fight Song. Key word: disrespectful.

Wednesday 8 February 2017

They had me in the paper like I was gone, all it took was 50 thou' to come back home

"I exited the county like a muthaf*ckin' G
On two homicides they got nothin' on me
The state is weak, they can't f*ck witcha boy
The put me all on the news - look, f*ckin' witcha boy!"


Fat Tone - Not Guilty
(From Tha Stick Up Kid album; 2003)



Another favourite Fat Tone slap. Bit ironic that the guy initially rumoured to be responsible for Mac Dre's death should have his own equivalent of Punk Police because Not Guilty is an autobiographical joint about Tone beating a double-murder case, and the importance of hiring a good lawyer when the cops come running. File this one under ‘songs Max B really shoulda listened to before he decided to let Gerald Saluti defend him.’

Sunday 5 February 2017

Girlfriends will be lost in time like tears in rain

"I saw you.. AND HIM!
Walking in the rainnnnnn
Do-do-do-do-do
You can try and deny and lie.. BITCH!
But I'm two steps ahead of the game
Two steps, two steps, two steps"


Fat Tone ft. Boi Big - Walking In The Rain (Martorialist Edit)
(From Tha Stick Up Kid album; 2003/Ya host's stash; 2017)



Fat Tone AKA the Kansas City rapper who was murdered in revenge for killing Mac Dre even though he evidently had nowt to do with Dre's death. Here's a shortened edit of my favourite Tone song via Jack The Snipper, a throwback to the days when rappers would occasionally get their girlfriend stolen instead of stealin' everyone else's girlfriends. Why an edit? Because the proper version outstays its welcome with an outro phonecall which drags on for a minute and a half. New rule: if you ain't Snoop on the Deeez Nuuuts intro or Mac Dre circa Back N Da Hood, keep all phonecalls outta rap songs.

Thursday 2 February 2017

Ashley Cole & Cheryl Tweedy back!

"Havin' interracial relations with this motherf*ckin' white
You play me like I'm pussy, take your motherf*ckin' life
Am I a shooter who keep a Ruger? Bitch, you motherf*ckin' right
I keep a ruler like a tutor, I don't motherf*ckin' fight"


OMB Peezy - Interracial Relations
(From Soundcloud; 2017)



Once again it's on! How's the Lay Down kid's freestyle over a 1998 Soulja Slim classic sound fresher than damn-near any rap that's dropped in 2017? Interracial Relations almost has me wishing I'd never heard From What I Was Told because Peezy sounds to the manor born on that vintage No Limit factory-line beat. Oil and water don't mix like Durex and Catholics, but Peezy's gas on this one is so fluid it's makin' a mockery of everything ya host was taught in chemistry class.

Peezy's brand new single is hot too. Lad sounds like he could hail from Louisiana, the Bay or Detroit, but actually comes from Alabama, albeit with some ties to Sacramento. That'd explain why he's recorded songs with Lavish D's main producer.

Wednesday 1 February 2017

You sang beautifully just now

Via Gwarizm, it's the infamous Style Wars the Musical short which has only ever partially existed online in muffled cameraphone footage previously. No Lucille Ball hairdos or Computer Rock burners are present, but Skeme & his mam are down in the f*ckin' kitchen singing their f*ckin' arses off like f*ckin' birds. THIS IS IT!:


Style Wars the Musical from ApK on Vimeo.

Best believe the only La La Land we acknowledge here at The Martorialist belongs to Green Velvet.